Suicide is the second leading cause of death among those aged 10 to 24 at a time when overall suicide rates have declined. While child and teen suicides have reached epidemic proportions, this epidemic is a silent one. We do not talk enough about suicide in our families, schools, churches, and in communities at large. Is suicide not discussed more openly because of fear of making it worse or an assumption that nothing can be done about it anyway?

In the largest increase of any age and sex group, the suicide rate for males aged 15 to 24 increased 8 percent from 2020 to 2021! New research from the CDC shows that close to 60 percent of high school girls struggle with persistent sadness or hopelessness, and in 2021, 30 percent seriously considered suicide. This is up considerably from 10 years ago, when those statistics were 36 percent and 19 percent, respectively. However, with a proper understanding of this problem and efforts to intervene, we can help teens experiencing a suicidal crisis.

Suicide is the taking of one’s own life, yet the issue is more complex than that with signs and symptoms indicating suicide may be a possibility in a teen’s life. Teens may experience and express suicidal thoughts about committing suicide or may discuss or research how it might be done. A teen may have an unsuccessful suicide attempt or may exhibit other behaviors that indicate the person may be considering or planning suicide. These are significantly more common than actual suicide completions and are every bit as serious of a problem.

Recent studies show that 19 percent of high school students seriously consider suicide, and 9 percent actually attempt it. Why would so many teens want to take their lives? While a complex subject, several main factors are involved. These include social concerns and pressures, mental health issues, the developmental stage of adolescence, and suicide as a problem-solving strategy. In essence, considering and attempting suicide is a solution to a problem. We all have problems in life, some that can seem insurmountable at times.  Thinking about and considering escape is not uncommon as a way to deal with overwhelming problems.

Most people don’t get to the place of suicide as the chosen solution to the significant problems of life because other solutions and help are readily available. But if the problem seems so large with no obvious solution, ending one’s life can begin to seem the only option. When you add hopelessness to this scenario in addition to not valuing oneself or one’s life, it begins to make more sense. If someone is isolated and doesn’t believe anyone cares or that anyone can or will help, this becomes a person who might act on suicidal thoughts.

Understanding the thought process of the person considering suicide is important because it can lead to ways to help them. We can help those struggling to consider other solutions and walk through those solutions with them. Encouraging hope and ending isolation are crucial intervention tools.

Adolescent Development

A huge contributing factor to teen suicide is the developmental stage of adolescence. Significant psychological, relational, and physical development occurs in the person 12 to 25 years old. If you think about it, this is the period in life where a child goes from being almost completely dependent upon parents to a place of independence and self-sufficiency as an adult. A lot must happen, and a lot can go wrong in this process.

Physically, the brain is not fully developed until about age 25. The last part to develop is called the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain immediately behind the forehead. This is the “executive functioning” part of the brain. It allows for complex analysis and decision-making. The teen struggling with overwhelming problems doesn’t have the mental capacity for adult decision-making and problem-solving skills. This can make them more impulsive. One of the best factors protecting a teen against suicide is having positive relationships with adults who understand, care for, and are willing to help the teen with the problems of growing up.

Psychologically, the age range of 12 to 25 is a time of radical change. During this stage you are figuring out who you are. You are defining yourself. What are you good at as far as talents and abilities? What makes you valuable and likeable to others? How do you fit in with others? Who are you as a man or woman? What will you become as an adult? These are just some of the important identity and social questions answered in adolescence.

Adolescence is a time where kids begin to look less to parents and adults for the answers to these questions and more to their peers. While this may not be ideal, it is inevitable. The bad news is that kids are looking to other kids to tell them who they are and whether they are good enough. The fundamental problem with this is that other kids don’t have the answers because they do not know who they are either. 

The good news is that teens don’t completely stop looking to adults for these answers. They do begin to look to adults other than parents though, and this is good news. As a community, we can be aware of this and provide helpful connection and feedback to teens who are trying to figure out who they are and whether they are good enough. Positive answers to those questions are among the most important factors in the prevention of suicide.

Now let’s be honest here — we adults can be so distracted by the demands of life that seeing the world through a teen’s eyes, being engaged with them, and pursuing them for meaningful interaction can be a challenge. This is also difficult because sometimes teens give us the message they don’t want adults involved. What they really want are adults who care and can be patient and persistent with them. Being there for teens starts with parents and other adult family members. It also extends into our community organizations of schools, churches, youth sports, clubs, and even neighborhoods.

Mental Health

Mental illness also affects teens and can contribute to teen suicide. Depression and high levels of anxiety are the two most common mental health issues connected to suicide. Depression makes the world look dark, things in life do not bring pleasure, thinking and decision making are compromised, and one begins to isolate and believe he or she is not worthwhile and does not matter. If that were not enough, depression often leads to a hopelessness that things will never change. In fact, it is this hopelessness that is the biggest predictor of suicide. When hopelessness is high, the person quits focusing on solving the problems of life and seriously considers ending life.

It is a myth that all teens who have suicidal thoughts or attempt suicide are depressed. Many are not depressed and show no signs of mental health concerns. Often these are the high achiever types who put a lot of pressure on themselves to be successful. For these folks, asking for help can be difficult and shameful. The stress of having to perform at high levels, meet expectations, and have it all together can be crushing; there can seem to be no way out. We see this in highly successful people who unexpectedly commit suicide.

One last mental health issue involves those who have what is called “vulnerable self-esteem.” A healthy self-esteem involves liking oneself, perceiving that others like you, and feeling confident in some areas in life. Many teens struggle with all of these. They don’t like themselves. Often, they don’t like their bodies because they are not what society says is desirable. They don’t believe that others like them either and often have experienced rejection and bullying. Further, they may not have any specific skill, talent, or areas where they can feel successful. As a result, these teens can feel worthless, of no value to others or the world, and that their life doesn’t really matter. In this place, suicide can seem like an option.

Societal Factors

Besides the problem-solving, developmental, and mental health issues that teens struggle with, the world is a difficult place in which to live. We know that the impact of the recent pandemic was particularly difficult on kids and teens. The absence of the positive social connection at school and in other activities, the high anxiety, and the loneliness and isolation they experienced was very stressful.

Another societal factor is the significant rise in the questioning of sexual and gender identity. Many teens experience significant confusion in this area and are being pushed to make permanent decisions about their sexuality at a time when, developmentally, they are trying to figure out who they are in all areas of their lives. Being in an environment in which struggling with this normal developmental issue is not supported and is met with criticism is a contributor to suicide. The struggle itself is not connected to suicide, it is the hostility or lack of support that is the problem. A teen may feel pressure to identify quickly with traditional gender roles. The pressure can be on the other extreme when teens with a question about their sex and gender roles feel rushed to decide on an alternative and begin to live that alternative lifestyle out. This pressure comes from a changing culture, social media, politics, and in some places the medical and mental health fields. This pressure may be a factor in the rise in rates of suicidal thinking.

Other Risk Factors

Additional risk factors include the following:

• A history of suicide in family or friends

• Prior suicide attempts

• Mental health conditions, such as depression, anxiety, and substance abuse

• Serious family problems

• Recent relationship losses and/or breakups

• A recent emotional upheaval, public humiliation, or blow to their self-esteem

• Talk of suicide or death such as, “I wish I weren’t here; everyone would be better off without me.”

• A recent drop in grades or other erratic and sudden behavior changes

Preventing Teen Suicide

If a teen that you know is struggling or showing signs of a suicidal crisis, talk to them about it. Help them with their problems. Ask if they are having suicidal thoughts. It is a myth that asking about suicide will encourage someone to act on it. You should get the teen professional help; remove access to any potential lethal means such as firearms, medications, and alcohol; communicate love; and provide reassurance and hope.

To prevent a suicidal crisis, be engaged in the lives of the children and teens around you. Talk openly about their concerns and issues they face in life. Strong relationship connection is a significant protective factor. You should initiate conversations about feelings. Create an environment where feelings are talked about and healthy management of them is modeled. Let them know they are important to you and to others to create a strong sense of belonging. Help kids find things they are good at, enjoy, and have success with. Help them get connected to the outside world. This is helpful to development of a healthy self-esteem.

In many ways, growing up is more difficult than ever. Teens need help from healthy adults. In all likelihood, that is you in some teen’s life. Stay engaged with them, show your interest, and care. As adults who care about the teens in our world, we can make a difference.

Dr. Thomas Barbian is the executive director for the Christian Counseling Center of First Presbyterian Church in Columbia. He received his doctorate in clinical psychology from the Cambridge Graduate School of Psychology and Counseling in Los Angeles. He also holds a master’s degree in marriage, family and child counseling and a bachelor’s degree in Biblical studies.